Open your eyes
by freeflowingideas
Summary: I wish it was just a dream, my life, a big damn nightmare but it's not. It's a living nightmare, I can't decide which is better.
1. Chapter 1

"Chloe! Open your eyes, please, hold on." I can hear a voice pleading but it's not _the voice_ I wanted to hear. With all the energy left, I tried to open my heavy eyelids. All I can see was series of blurry lights, they are moving or maybe I am. I'm not sure.

"Chloe, please." And then there it is, a black hole sanctioning every piece of energy left in my body. I'm holding too long, it's winning. The lights are gone. I'm in total darkness. I'm falling, or maybe flying. I'm not sure.

"Chloe, hold on, Beca's on her way." The voice said to me. At the mention of the name, my hand comes alive. It's searching for something or someone, it's too dark and I'm scared. I need something or someone to hold on but my hand was met by none. Nothing. No one. So the darkness swallowed me whole, all the noise was gone. The stillness was deafening. I stopped moving. Maybe I hit the bottom rock or I'm soaring high. I'm not sure. I tried to open my eyes.

It's dark. I'm scared. "Mom!" I screamed my lungs out. My limbs are stuck, I can't move, thank god I can breathe, I'm soak in sweat. Where am I? "Mom!" I can hear rushing footsteps. "Mom, please help me!" I begged.

"Chloe? Where are you?" the sound of her voice it's enough to calm the panic in my head. I know she'll find me. "Mom." I said this time braver. "Keep talking." She said. I can hear she's close. "Mom, I'm here." Then there's red light. My body was hauled by large arms, the touch comforting me. I know I'm safe. "Oh, honey. It's ok, I got you." She said cradling me. I missed her voice, when was the last time I heard her voice? And the smell, her smell. I'm not sure. I nuzzled deeply into her. "Honey, open your eyes." She said her voice was full of love and longing, she tucked a strand of hair behind my ears. "No, you'll be gone if I open them." I said stubbornly. That explains the red lights. "No, I'll always be here." She pointed gently on my chest. I slowly opened my eyes. Black. It's all black.

"Chloe, open your eyes." A little boy's voice said. _Chris_. "No, I'm scared!" the little version of my voice said. When was the last time I heard this voice? Long time ago. I'm not sure. I can feel my body sitting, and it's ascending, the wind blowing my hair wildly. "If you won't open your eyes you'll miss the view!" My older brother pinched the bridge of my nose, it's enough to give me courage. "Open it! 1! 2! 3!" I opened them.

"Give me your purse you bitch!" I waited for it. The stab or maybe a shot. Where? In the head? In the back? I don't know. But it never came. I heard footsteps. It's familiar. Then, I heard flying fist against a skin. I felt hands on my shoulders. I flinched. "Hey, it's ok. It's me. I got you." My dad's voice reassuring me. "Open your eyes sweetie." "No! If I open them you'll be gone too! Just like mom and Chris! I can't do this anymore dad." He pulled me into an embrace. "That's not true! We are never gone, we're always here." He pointed on my chest. I felt his lips on top of my head. I cried in his arms. I cried, sobbed and screamed for all the things I've lost, for my mom for leaving us too soon, stupid cancer. I cried for my brother for leaving me and my dad behind to serve the country, stupid gunshot that went straight to his heart. I cried for my dad for leaving me alone with no one, stupid dream for being so beautiful than reality that didn't let my father see the next sunrise. I cried for myself, the first Christmas I got no one to celebrate with, I cried for the sympathy look I always get from my neighbors. I cried for everything, for being alone, for being weak, for my pathetic life. I cried for hours, until the arms holding me were no longer arms. It's my own, bracing myself. I opened my eyes. Black. Of course.

Someone's shaking me. "Chlo, wake up. It's just a dream." I wish it was just a dream, my life, a big damn nightmare but it's not. It's a living nightmare, I can't decide which is better. "Hey, it's ok. I'm here. I'm real, I won't leave you. Open your eyes." "NO!" I yelled at her. She kissed my closed eyes. "I'm real." She kissed the tip of my nose. I carefully opened my eyes. It's dark but I can see someone really close to me. I hugged her. _Beca._

I'm being sanction again, I feel like dirt being vacuum. I dared myself not to close my eyes. It's dark but there's a faint source of light. It's far but still makes a difference. My body was longing for the light. I need to get there. I can't stay in the dark. _Beca help me._

That's it. A stronger force pulled me closer to the light. It's blinding me now. I don't want to close my eyes but it's impossible. The pulling stopped. I gently open my eyes, bright. After vigorous fluttering of my eyelids my eyes finally adjusted. I'm looking up, staring directly on the light on the ceiling. I removed my eyes from my stare. _I saw her_. Her hair disheveled her head resting on her arms. The familiar dark blue eyes are closed, her nose all red and her breathing, she sounded like she have a bad cold. She's holding a hand. I shifted my gaze. I saw her. _I saw me_, lying lifeless on a bed. My eyes are closed, my right eye surrounded by violet and red color, someone must have punched me but at least there's a color on my face. My lips, chapped and pale. There's a stitch on my forehead. A tube was inserted on my nose. I walked closer. I'm wearing the depressing hospital gown.

"Beca." I called out to her. Her dark blue eyes opened she craned her neck and looked at me. Not me but the me lying beside her. She gently lifted my hand and kissed it.

"Chloe." Her voice cracked. "Please wake up." Tears are streaming down on her cheeks. I want to wipe her tears. "Beca." I tested her name on my tongue. "Chloe please, open your eyes… don't be afraid. I'm here. I'm real. I won't leave you." She begged me but the me in the bed was deaf. I didn't even flinch.

A question crossed my mind. _Why and how did get I here?_

* * *

**A/N: Looks like I'm always writing fluffy and funny stuff, so let me try something else. I leave you this. I'll be away but when I come back Military Calls and this will be updated. Til next time!**


	2. Chapter 2

Barden was a fresh start for me, my grandparents took care of me. Not really took care as my parents did but rather financially. I refused to live with them. Not that I don't love them. I do but I'm trying to move on and seeing them everyday as a reminder of what I've lost was not good.

After high school graduation, I packed my bags and went to Barden. My parents want me to study medicine but I buried their dreams with their bodies. I chose different major, arts.

I drowned myself with every piece I made, sculpture, painting, or drawing. I release all the emptiness I feel and it was all paid off, good grades and relief. I distanced myself from everyone, I don't need friends or company even boyfriend. I'm perfectly fine all by myself. There's no need for me to worry that someone close to me will disappear without saying goodbye. I don't care if they labeled me loner, so what, I know I'm safe.

One day hazy afternoon, I was painting in school garden near the lake, not everyone knows about it. It was beautiful with all the scene especially like this twilight. My paint brush knows where it should go releasing all the misery I feel when I heard a gasp behind.

"You're broken like Taylor Swift." A female voice declared. I ignored my intruder and slide my paint brush against the canvas blending violet and orange together.

"Oh no, you're worst than Adele." I stopped my hand and dabbed my brush on black paint, then went back to the canvas, darkening my already dark piece. The stranger leaned on just above my right shoulder, I saw brown hair. I can smell her, raspberry. My brother had brown hair. My stroke got quicker and angrier. Small hands fell on my shoulders. I jolted at the contact.

"Relax." She squeezed my tensed shoulders. I stood up bumping my shoulder on her chin. She yelped from pain. I started gathering my things. "Are you not even sorry?" she asked me.

"Sorry for what? Your pain was self inflicted. You shouldn't sniff around other's piece." I countered sarcastically.

I turned around. She's incredibly small and pale, she's massaging her chin. My eyes traveled on her eyes. The effect of twilight and lake made it beautiful. The shade of blue, it's calming. Her face, all friendly and sweet. I peered down, she's wearing red top with gray cardigan, blue pants and combat boots."Now look who's sniffing." My eyes darted back on her face. She smiled at me.

Someone smiled. Not a sympathy smile but a really nice smile. It made my heart warm for a little. A smile was making its way out of my lips but the corner of my mouth dropped, the flicker of warm in my chest burned cold. Today was the day my brother was shot dead how can I smile?

I picked up my canvas and walked away. I can hear her calling for me, my pace got faster.

Three hushed knocks caught Beca's attention. I looked at the door, a blonde. Aubrey. She walked in at stopped on Beca's side. She put her hand on Beca's back and rubbed it gently. "She's gonna be ok." Aubrey said. "She's tough." It made Beca cried harder. "Hey, why don't you get some rest? I'll watch over her." Beca shook her head furiously. "You're here for two days, Beca, give yourself a break."

Two days? I'm stuck in the darkness for two days? "Chloe will be mad if you don't take care of yourself." Aubrey said convincing Beca. "It's gonna be ok, I'll call you right away if she wakes up, get some nap and shower then come back." Beca sat still. After few seconds she slowly got on her feet. She leaned in on my forehead and gave me a lingering kiss. "I'll be right back. Please wake up. _I love you_." She whispered to me. I love you. _I love you_. Her words are like arrows straight to my heart. She loves me. How can she? She walked out and closed the door gently. Aubrey sat on the chair beside my bed."Hi. Chlo, how are you feeling today?" she asked the lifeless me. I can stay here and watch Aubrey chat with me but I'm worried about Beca.

A sanctioning energy pulled me, the next thing I know I'm in a passenger seat beside Beca. The drive was quiet no usual music. I can sense heavy thoughts on her mind. Few blocks away she pulled over. I watched her stare at nothing in particular. "It's my fault." She whispered. "It's my fucking fault!" she yelled. She punched the steering wheel. One, two, three she can't stop. She's screaming, punching and crying. I've been through a lot of this. "Beca," I called out.

"It's ok. I'm alright. I'm here." I said trying to comfort her. It seems like she heard me. She stopped moving. She wiped her face and went back driving. Maybe I'm not that invisible at all?

"Hey!" I heard a familiar voice. I'm walking on the quad, my last class ended. I ignored the voice and walked straight. "Hey you! Red!" the voice yelled. I'm not wearing red so I did not turn, who else will call me? None. "Redhead! Wearing blue can you please stop walking?!" She instructed. I'm wearing my lucky blue blouse. What are the chances that someone else is wearing blue? Too many. I did not turn around. "You're stubborn!" I heard quick footsteps behind me. I stopped walking just in time she break into running. Too late to stop the momentum. She bumped on my back. Hard. I almost lost my balance, too bad for her. She fall butt first. "Ow." I turned around and saw her rubbing her forehead. "Why do I always get hurt when I come close to you?" She asked me. "It's a sign that you _shouldn't_ get close." True. "But if getting hurt will bring me closer I think its fine." She winked at me, I rolled my eyes. She got on her feet and offered her hand. "I'm Beca."

* * *

The car came to a stop in front of an apartment. Beca killed the engine and went out. I don't know how but I'm suddenly out of the car. She fumbled the keys and opened the door. I inhaled the familiar scent. It's mine. She went straight to a room, I followed her. The wall, there's a mosaic of pictures meticulously made. I walked near it. There's me eating ice cream, me sleeping with my mouth open, Beca and I on a swing, me painting, Beca and I laughing. It's too many. Beca collapsed on the bed. She grabbed a pillow, _my pillow_ and smelled it. I can hear her mumbling something. I sat on the bed. "Come back please, Chloe? I love you." She said over and over again until it becomes a ragged breathing. I lay next to her. My pillow was wet from her tears. I reached for her face. I felt nothing, _of course_. I retract my hand and lay still. Her breathing was comforting few minutes passed and I joined her on her slumber.

**A/N: We'll take things slow, ok?**


	3. Chapter 3

"I don't care." I said turning my heels back to my direction, I heard her sigh and walked beside me. I stopped in tracks and faced her. "Don't you get it? I don't like you, back off!" I barked at her, she looked at me with pain expression, I feel an inch of guilt but I brushed it away. "I just wanna be friends." She insisted with defeated tone. "I don't need friends." I walked out. "I'm still here if you change your mind!" she shouted. As if I'll ever.

* * *

Surprising isn't it? I'm stuck in in between, I'm invisible yet I can sleep? I woke up to the sound of the bed squeaking. I saw Beca getting out of bed, she grabbed her robe and went to shower. I lay still in bed, the sound of water splashing on her body and tiles filled my ears. Does she mean it? She loves me? How? Do I love her back? I can't. I'm incapable of love. The water stopped, few seconds later she emerged from the bathroom. I sat up on the bed and watch her. Her eyes all puffy and red, she sat on the dresser. She's looking in the mirror directly to me, as if she can see me. "Get yourself together." I commanded her. Her stare linger for few more moments then she blinked and grabbed the brush lying in front of her and started fixing her hair. She stood up and went to the closet and grabbed a pair of decent clothes, I looked away while she's changing. She tossed the robe back to its place, she went out of the room, I followed her. "Aren't you hungry?" I asked her. Her tummy grumbles. She walked to the small kitchen and headed to the fridge. She sighed when she saw the pictures posted on the ref. There's me sculpting, me sitting on green grass, me covered with flour, me lying on her lap, us wearing dress. Her stomach growled again, she opened the fridge and produced a box of milk. She rummaged the cupboards and grabbed a box of cereals and a bowl, she ate without a sound. This scenario looks familiar to me. Oh, of course, I always eat alone, no family members to eat with. No mother to cook for me, no brother to tease me, no father to ask about my day. Seeing my pathetic life on others is kind of sad. We both jumped on the sound of her phone ringing. She fished it out of her pocket.

"What happened?" she asked the other line, her voice already frantic. "I'll be there." And just like that I'm back to the hospital.

* * *

"Nice dress miss." I heard a manly voice followed by a whistle. I'm on my way to cemetery to visit my mother. It's her birthday. It's been a long drive and dealing with asshole was the last thing I wanna do today. "Are you deaf or something?" he said raising his voice, I can hear his footsteps near me. I walked faster. He grabbed my arm and forced me to face him. There's a big scar across his face. He grinned, showing his crooked teeth. I felt a shiver run down on my spine. How stupid of me to park far and actually thought to enjoy the walk towards my family grave. "Hey! There you are." I heard a female voice, it sounds familiar. We both looked at the source of the voice. There she is, holding a bouquet of white lilies. A camera dangling on her neck, the man let go of my arm. She moved towards us and put her arm of my waist. I jolted from her touch. "I'm sorry I'm late." She smiled at me, I gave her a questioning look, she motioned us to walk. "Where do you think you're going?" the scared man yelled at us. She handed me the lilies and grabbed the camera on her neck. Before the man can speak again she snapped a photo of him. "My camera is connected to my computer and if there's something bad happened to me the authorities can search it. It'll lead to you." She said smiling. The man looked taken aback, he moved one stepped backward. She snapped a picture again, he stepped backwards and runway.

"That's easy." She said turning to me. "What's that for?" I asked her, irritated. "I just saved you. A nice thank you will be fine." She said still smiling. I have no idea why. "I don't need your help." I pushed the flowers on her chest. "Easy, I'm just being nice." She said frowning a little. "I don't need you being nice. Why are you even here anyway? Are you following me?" I asked her, suspicion growing in my head. "No." her tone changed, all the cheerfulness was gone. "I'm visiting someone really close to me." She said looking at the flowers, her eyes suddenly full of old memories. I feel guilty. How can I think that everything is about me? Stupid. She shifted her gaze to me. "I'm sorry if I freaked you out. I should get going." She walked away leaving me. Should I apologize? I think not. I took a deep breath and made my way to my destination.

* * *

Aubrey was being pushed outside. The nurses and doctors filling the room. What's happening? I can hear the monitor near my bed wailing. "Pulse?" a gray haired doctor asked. "It's dropping." "Breathing?" he asked again. "Not good." "You can't get in ma'am!" I looked at the door Beca was clawing her way in. "Chloe!" she shouted. Two men appeared on her back and grabbed her arms. "Calm down ma'am, they're doing their best." I watched her watched me being electrified. One attempt, the line on the monitor didn't change. Second attempt, none. They injected something and electrified me. I looked at Beca. She's crying again. "Chloe, hold on. Open your eyes." I can hear her whisper. I felt the rush of the current in my chest. The monitor shows waves. Pulse. It's back. Beca was now standing with Aubrey. A slight relief on their faces. The gray haired doctor went out of the room. I'm standing side by side with Beca and Aubrey. "That was a close call." He started. "I can't lie to you, she's still not stable, thank god she reacted to epinephrine and I want to tell you to prepare yourself for the possibilities." He trailed off. "She's tough, she can make it." Beca insisted. Surprise surprise, I'm dying.

* * *

Stupid cab for taking short cut that end up the other way around, I am now late for Creative Mind Convention. Who wants to draw attention went they made their grand entrance late? We finally arrived on the hotel hosting the convention, I paid the driver and hurried my way to the auditorium. I gently opened the door, scared to grab everyone's attention. The light dimmed, I spotted a vacant seat. I sighed when I finally settled.

"A little late are we?" I looked at the person beside me, it's dark I can't recognize her and as if I knew anyone. I squinted my eyes, I can see the outline of her face, she's smiling. And so we meet again. I rolled my eyes hoping she can see it.

"Good afternoon everyone." The speaker started grabbing our attention. "Welcome to this year's Creative Mind Convention, we are happy to see your enthusiastic faces, some are familiar, some are new and to begin this, this year's mood is, roulette please." A roulette appeared on his projector, I watched it spin. Creative Mind is a program expounding aspiring artist's talent. Every year the theme was selected based on moods or emotions. Last year the mood was despair. I'm the most in despair human being I know, I really enjoyed it last year, that's why when my professor asked me if I want to attend again I didn't think twice. The roulette stopped selecting hopeful. Hopeful? What's left there for me to hope for? This is gonna be hard. "Hopeful." The host announced. "And to make things interesting, there's a twist, instead of doing the activities alone, we decided to pair the attendees. There's a sticker under your chairs, a number printed on it. So whoever has the same number like you, you are partners until the end of this convention." He finished with a proud smile, I can see the audience bobbing their heads.

Maybe it's just me? Who doesn't like to have a partner? People starting to look at the sticker under their chairs, what choice do I have? I'm already here. I searched for my sticker. Number 8. I exhaled. What now? The light was switched on. A boy started to walk towards me. I'm _hopeful_ he's not my partner. I hate the stupid grin on his face. "Hey, what's your number?" he asked me when he reached my seat. I waved the sticker on his face. A frown in his face tells me we're not. Thanks. "I've been looking for you." A voice behind me declared. It's my turn to frown. Seriously? I turned around. There's an uncertain expression on her face, she lifted her sticker, a number 8 on it. I rolled my eyes. Of course we are meant to be. I should've thought thrice before going here. "I can switch number with the guy talking to you earlier." She sound thoughtful, she tiptoed and started looking around the room. "It's fine. I don't like him anyway." I resigned.

"And you liked me?" a _hopeful_ tone. "I didn't say that neither." I quirked an eyebrow. "Not now but later."

* * *

**Sorry for the really delay update.. Things are really getting out of hand. I have to finish this really soon before you forget this story exist.**


End file.
